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He was having a good time talking to the “divorced lady.” He walked me to my car and then asked if he could get in.

“Uh…sure…” I said, seriously still not getting the fact that he liked me. We kissed for a long time and then he asked me for my phone number.

He did call and we ended up dating for a few months. Jackie Pilossoph is the creator and Editor-In-Chief of Divorced Girl Smiling.

But, had he decided never to call me again, the mold had already been broken. The author of the novels, Divorced Girl Smiling and Free Gift With Purchase, Pilossoph also writes the weekly dating and relationships advice column, “Love Essentially”, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press and the Chicago Tribune online.

It’s a well known fact that every single woman drops at least 10 pounds the minute she becomes recently separated. She gets upset and is unable to eat frequently, she’s stressed about the unknown, the attorney fees, and how her kids are doing. Most people would say they feel confident, sexy, that they love the feeling of their clothes practically falling off of them. ’ I looked in the mirror one day and I felt really, really old and tired. I didn’t feel like I was attractive on the inside or outside. I was a stay at home mom: I hadn’t had a job in 6 years.

She’s busy, or she might have just started working again. And lastly, the recently separated woman is dating again. Most would say they see themselves as being more attractive, right? But, let me take you into the mind of the recently separated 40 something woman. I had zero self esteem when it came to my professional ability, and figured the only skills I had now were diaper changing, bottle feeding and house cleaning.

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I think my drive home that night was the turning point in my newly separated life.

In a few short hours, I’d gone from thinking my romantic opportunities were over to realizing that a new part of my life was just beginning. Although, let’s be honest, I looked at my cell phone every three seconds the next day.

I was a newly separated divorced girl who had gone from hopeless, insecure and timid, to confident, poised and ready to face the world as an older version of my best self. By the way, I’m pretty happy in life right now, and I’ve gained back the 10 pounds. Check out, “Honey, I Want A Divorce” or “Dating Over 50: Are We In No-Man’s Land? Additionally, she is a Huffington Post contributor.

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