Risks of dating someone with hiv
Shame and fear was a part of it, but even more so I think there was a part of me that wanted to pretend that HIV hadn't happened to me.
When a person goes on treatment — I take one pill a day — undetectable is the goal.
Staying on treatment and keeping my viral load at undetectable levels means that I'm going to lead a long healthy life.
I was living in New York City with a boyfriend I'll call Matt when I was diagnosed with HIV. It was my first steady, long-term relationship, and we did what I used to think of as "grown-up" things.
Like having Sunday football parties or fighting in Home Depot about what color to paint an accent wall in our living room.
Taking care of your health is more adult than playing house with a boyfriend, yet, even though I had been tested for STIs, I had never thought of getting an HIV test.
But one day, randomly, I added the HIV rapid test to the list of things to do before intake to my pap smear appointment.
I had no type, no goal, really, and a bad one-night stand was just as much as fun as one that turned into a mini-romantic fling.
I naively thought I was invincible, that one day a hookup would lead to true Disney princess-style love, and never assumed that HIV would have anything to do with my life.
Not disclosing my status at first led to a lot of heartache and unnecessary hurt for both me and my partners when I eventually give them the "bad news." The 'bad news' was less about their risk of getting HIV and more about how I had deceived them, which is not an especially attractive quality in a mate.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating